Monday, January 9, 2012

A Window to the World Through a Faceless Book




        Confession:  I am kind of a FaceBook freak.  Not in a bad way, mind you.   It is kind of my poor-woman's escape from reality, since I can't afford a plane ticket to Cozumel.  I can see what YOU are doing, tell you what I am doing, and even post pictures of things as they happen.  It's kind of like the old-fashioned Peeping Toms, creeps who would get happy off sneaking around town and looking into other people's windows...except we now ALLOW it and are willing participants in it.  Society has definitely evolved into something interesting when we can allow others access to our daily thoughts without any face to face interaction at all...FACEbook, indeed.  More like Alfred Hitchcock's Rear Window, if you ask me...

  For those of you too young to remember, Rear Window is a movie where a man, temporarily disabled, is confined to his apartment -- where his only form of entertainment is spying on his neighbors through binoculars from his window, living through them as he recuperates.  He sees (or thinks he sees) a murder take place, and spends the rest of the movie trying to convince people that a woman has actually been murdered.  No one believes him at first, but eventually he convinces those closest to him to take a second look.  And what they find changes things forever.  The reason I make the comparison between FaceBook and this movie is simple -- what YOU see through your binoculars may be the truth or a finely crafted fib.  A mask faced outward to society's view, put there to hide what is really going on within.  You see what someone wants you to see, and only that.

        FaceBook is an interesting peek into society's anomalies...

        Friends of my children, who probably wouldn't invite me to a sleepover, think nothing of "friending" me and posting on my page.  Consequently, I friend them in return, allowing me to use my binoculars to return to my teen years through their open window.  Luckily, my page remains pretty tame -- I don't use profanity or post inappropriate things, and I usually will hide or block people that do.  So I am a pretty safe grown-up "window" for the teens to peer through.  I am sorry to report, however, that a lot of their pages are, um,  not for prime-time viewing.  I remain friends with them anyway -- choosing to see what I want to, and quietly watching for things that may require leaving my window and visiting them face to face.  In case you are wondering, my children DO have a FaceBook, but ONLY with me as their friend.  Spy? You bet. Stalker? Not if I don't have to be -- and they know that.

        Second, some people say things on FaceBook that they would never say in public.  EVER.  And due to the fact FaceBook has not unleashed an artificial intelligence app, you can't tell tone from a post.  People sometimes post things in a purposely vague tone, leaving your imagination and paranoia to wonder, "is she talking about me???"  Safe behind the window, but close enough for binocular viewing, your true thoughts can be broadcast to the masses.  I am kind of guilty of this one.  When things happen at work that make me reconsider my job path, I weave fairy tales on my FaceBook page.  Only the people close to the situation get the hidden meanings, and the rest of my friends think I am just being my usual decidedly clever self.  Like some of the neighbors in Rear Window, I can also "pull my shade" -- blocking certain people (like who I am venting about) from reading my posts.  Or, like other apartment dwellers, I can leave my window open to the world and openly poke at anyone I choose.  Poke. Just like that.

          Several years back, I was going through some pretty trying stuff personally -- mostly with issues related to a wayward child and, in an unrelated sense, to my own health.  In a period of three months, I lost 30 pounds and the majority of my sanity (and for those of you who know me, either loss by itself would be a huge thing).  My work was really the only thing holding me together at that point, but my window was closed.  And shrinking, along with my weight.  Some co-workers, rather than ask what was going on, simply spread outrageous rumors of cancer, drug use, eating disorders and the like.  My world was crumbling, and trying to carry the burdens alone on my now 98-pound shoulders was becoming more and more difficult. I felt like everyone's binoculars were turned firmly towards my failings.  But no one ever really asked me face-to-face what the problem(s) were.  FaceBook did not exist then, but I can only imagine what the posts would have been like.

        Then, a ray of light.  My direct manager, who had become a close personal friend, left the chair at his window and came down to my level.  He grilled me about what was going on and promised to be there for me.  He could always tell when I was having a bad day. He then said something I will never forget.  When I was wondering out loud how people who were supposed to be my friends could be so cruel, he said, "perception isn't always reality".  And then, and only then, did my window start opening a little.  I realized that if I couldn't recognize and accept the truth about myself, then how could I expect others to do the same?  And by the same respect, what people thought about me really didn't matter -- only the truth did.  And it was up to me how much of the truth I wanted to reveal, knowing that my choices would affect others' view through my window. Poke.

        That would be my last kind of pet peeve about the evolution of FaceBook.  The status updates that say things like "like this status and I will post the truth on your wall".  Or "rate me".  Like you are ever going to say anything approaching the truth anyway.  Your truth will be something so sugar coated and sticky sweet that it would spoil your supper, like "you are sooo beautiful and a great singer!".  Not the real meat-and-potatoes stuff like, "you dress crazy but you don't care and I like that about you" or "you should treat other people the way you want to be treated". Most people would never post anything like that in response to those questions because then people would be looking into their windows.  Or throwing virtual rocks through them. Perception isn't always reality.  And windows aren't always clean or open.  Just saying.

        Truth is.....I still enjoy FaceBook.  For all its idiosyncracies and hidden meanings, and especially the pictures.  I like it because it allows me to be a part of the lives of people I haven't been able to see face to face in years. I remain true to myself in my posts, and while sometimes purposely vague and mysterious, I am proud to say I have never posted hurtful, unkind, or profane comments.  I love to have a forum for posting sad, funny, or inspirational stuff and getting pats on the back from my virtual support group when I need it. But when given the chance, I would leave my window to be able to poke, high-five, hug, or kiss them in person.  And I do--every chance I get.   

       

       

No comments:

Post a Comment